A Work of Art

This is my second piece of art work simply titled "Sis, mom and me 1969". It is an oil painting on canvas. I enjoy painting. It is a creative outlet for me. It is amazing how you can transform the images and dreams from your mind into art that is visible, and touchable.

I am pleased with the final product. This picture now hangs in my sister's home. I hope it brings her happiness and joy.

Seabiscuit's Resurrection

Hallelujah!!! After two months, my car aka Seabiscuit is driveable. I was so upset on Friday, July 10, 2009 when the car dealer informed me it would cost $1,546 in repairs to get Seabiscuit fixed. In fact, upset is an understatement. I was indeed furious. I felt like I was being taken advantage of by unscrupulous, greedy, people. In my haste, I filled out a form online to give my car away. The next day, Saturday, I talked to my Cursillo friends. What is Cursillo? According to the National Episcopal Cursillo, the goal of Cursillo is "to change the world, to remake the world in Christ and to restore all things to Christ," beginning with our own environments. I participated in a three day Cursillo Retreat. The Three-Day Weekend introduces the strategy of Cursillo – a structure or a backbone for Christian life in every environment. The Fourth Day represents the ways that we continue to support each other in living that Christian life and it consists of Group Reunion, Ultreya, Spiritual Direction, and Communities in Action. My Cursillo group meets on Saturdays.

I shared with the Cursillo group, my transportation frustrations. My friends of course could relate to my car dilemma. I was so mad. I told my friends that I will just ride my bicycle until I save enough money for a new car. "What about saving up money to get your car fixed?" someone asked. No, I am so mad I plan to give my car away and start over with a new car, was my reply.

So, how did that work out? Well, I did not sign the documents to donate Seabiscuit. Instead, I used all my fury to fuel the energy I needed to pedal. I pedaled to work and back. I live 6 miles from work. The route I bike has lots of sidewalks and it is 10 miles. I biked a total of 20 miles a day, 5 days a week totaling 100 miles a week. This does not include the other places I went on my bike aka Mandy. (Yes, my bike and car have names.) I did everything on my bike, I went to the movie cinema, shopping, church, and work. Amazingly, the weather was great. Thanks to God, I did not get caught in torrential rain or high winds. I began commuting by bike to work August 7. As of September 13, 2009, I was still commuting by bicycle. After riding my bike almost everyday, how do I feel? I feel healthier. I also feel closer to God and my environment. There is nothing like seeing outdoor scenery free from the confines and insulation of an automobile. I was able to catch close up glimpses of nature. The creatures of nature tend to stay and continue in their natural habits instead of scurrying away. I was able to feel the warmth of the midday sun. I biked in the luminous light of the harvest moon. I hope and pray future generations will also have the same privilege to witness the beauty of our earth.(Click on the title "Seabiscuit's Resurrection" for a cool treat).

Now, that I have my car back, I plan to use it sparingly. Since I purchased my bike in May, I have rode more than 900 miles. When Seabiscuit was in a coma, Mandy was reliable and dependable. I rode my bike to the auto shop to pick up my car. After paying the very big repair bill, (I ended up going to another auto shop that charged me less than the dealer) I put my bike in the trunk of the car. It worked out well after all.

Car Saga-Seabiscuit's in a Coma

What an adventurous day I have had today dealing with Seabiscuit. I have affectionately named my car Seabiscuit. How did I happen upon the notion of naming my car? There is a hilarious show on National Public Radio called "Car Talk". It is hosted by Click and Clack The Tappet Brothers aka Tom and Ray Magliozzi.Tom and Ray are professional auto mechanics in real life who offer their expertise in diagnosing car problems as their personas The Tappet Brothers on the air every Saturday morning. During one very funny episode, one of The Tappet Brothers suggested the female caller should give her car a name. If the car had a name, the caller could bond with her car and perhaps take it to the auto shop when it was symptomatic.

Why did I choose the name Seabiscuit? Seabiscuit was a race horse who despite having several physical and emotional disabilities,(the horse was described as having wobbly knees, being skittish, nervous and hard to work with) won the 1938 Pimlico. According to the Car Fax Report on my car, it was once a rental car. While it was under the ownership of a rental car company, it was involved in several accidents. The front end had been damaged in one accident. In another accident, the driver side door was damaged and had to be replaced. Despite all of the previous history, Seabiscuit was dependable. He never left me stranded.

Sadly, Seabiscuit is in a coma. The last time I drove Seabiscuit was on Sunday, July 5. Four days, I left my car parked and biked around town on my hybrid electric bike aka Mandy. On Thursday, July 9, I attempted to start the car. It would not start. I had an early morning meeting to attend. Mandy came through for me. Although I was not dressed in my biking gear, I rode my bike in my casual business attire to the meeting. After returning home from the meeting, I called a tow truck and had the car towed to the auto shop.

On Friday, the auto shop gave me Seabiscuit's diagnosis. The fuel pump, fuel regulator and steering column all needed to be replaced. The estimated cost: $1,546. Friday evening, I rode Mandy to the auto shop, called a tow and had Seabiscuit towed back home.

I don't want to seem shallow and ungrateful to Seabiscuit for being so good to me. As my bank account would dictate, I could not afford the $1,546 repair. Herein, is the crux of the situation. I secretly long to be free of the bondage of car insurance, car repairs, car taxes, and dependence on crude oil. Among the people I admire, are the cyclists I see commuting to work daily. Therefore, I have made my decision. While, Seabiscuit sits in a suspended state of unconciousness, I will be riding around town on Mandy.

There is hope for Seabiscuit to have a new life. I visited the Car Talk website. On the website, there was a link for vehicle donations: http://www.v-dac.com/cartalk
I filled out the form online. I decided to donate Seabiscuit to my local public radio station: WFPL-89.3 Seabiscuit will live on in my memories and this blog.
(Click on the title "Car Saga..." for a link to a special treat.)

Copyright 2009, Michelle I. Peterson. Some rights reserved.
To reproduce or distribute, visit: miva-music.icopyright.com

Lemonade Anyone?

All things bright and beautiful,
All creatures great and small,
All things wise and wonderful:
The Lord God made them all.

Ere goes the first few lines of one of my favorite hymns. This hymn reminds me of the beauty of nature and the God who created it. The timeless words to this hymn were written by Cecil F. Alexander in 1848. This is the story of Creation from the Book of Genesis.

Life is an awesome, astounding, wonderful, beautiful, miraculous, thing.I remember preparing for the birth of my first child. Even though intellectually, I knew what was going on, the emotional, spiritual, and physical experience was beyond words. From cells, a human being is formed. I am convinced babies have their own distinct personalities before birth. Before a child is conceived, she is known by the Creator. I am blessed to have two daughters who will soon be embarking on their own paths in life.

Each little flow'r that opens
Each little bird that sings,
He made their glowing colors
He made their tiny wings.

No, motherhood is not easy. Is anything worthwhile ever easy? I'd say motherhood is rewarding, enriching, full of joy and pain. The hardest part of being a mom for me was when my beautiful baby girls started pulling away from me to find their own identities. That is how it is supposed to be. I look forward to the next chapter in my life relating to my children in their adult selves. No matter their ages, I will remember the little baby girls that used to cling to me whenever a stranger was near.

The cold in the winter,
The pleasant summer sun,
The ripe fruits in the garden,
He made them every one.

My oldest daughter has been living with her father since she was 14. She is now 18 and preparing for her freshman year of college. The youngest daughter at 16, is back home with me after living with her dad and sister for 2 years. I went from suddenly having an empty nest to having a 16 year old roommate. I have enjoyed having my youngest daughter back at home. We are having a lot of summer fun.

I love the summer weather. My daughter and I have been riding our bikes around town witnessing the beauty of creation. Summer is also the time when lemonade is served after church. There is a volunteer list to serve lemonade. Guess what? I signed up to serve lemonade. This time last year, I could not see any good that would come out of me living apart from my children. Both of my children decided to go live with their father. During those years, they also decided to stop attending church.

What good came out of the separation? Suddenly, I had so much free time. I was free to pursue my interests and hobbies. I ended up enrolling in college,rekindling my interest in painting,and engaging in activities that challenged and stimulated me creatively and intellectually. My children grew, and matured to find themselves.(I think this is called "growing pains"). They had to decide what influences from both parents they were going to accept or reject.

I invite you to come to church and enjoy a cup of sweet lemonade.

He gave us eyes to see them,
And lips that we might tell
How great is God Almighty,
Who has made all things well.




Copyright 2009, Michelle I. Peterson. Some rights reserved.
To reproduce or distribute, visit: miva-music.icopyright.com

iPhone and me.

I have not been blogging lately. I have been busy with school, work, and my iPhone. I purchased mine about three weeks ago. What can I say about this revolutionary invention? I am pleased at the plethora of applications to choose from for the phone.
The iPhone is not only a functional cell phone but also a personal data assistant. With my PDA I can, record memmos, e-mail,take photos, use a calculator, notate important upcoming events on my calendar, and use the internet. I haven't even mentioned all of the thousands of applications that are availabale for the iPhone. You can program your iPhone for your lifestyle. Some of the applications I have downloaded on my phone are, Quicken for banking, Lose It to keep track of my caloric intake, and The Weather Channel to keep me informed of atmospheric conditions. My iPhone is linked up also with Twitter and Facebook.

Twitter and Facebook are both social networking sites. Facebook is a great way to stay in touch with family and friends while Twitter is a great way to connect with the wonderful world of business. My analogy of the differences between Facebook and Twitter gives insight on the ways I use each network.

I am looking forward to my family reunion this summer in July. I plan to use my iPhone to help me in recording my family history.

Little Women

Last spring break.

Yesterday was a special day. I spent the day with two up and coming young women. One was a sixteen year old,(my youngest daughter) and the other was an eighteen year old,(my oldest daughter).

The eldest soon will be embarking upon her own adventure. She has been anxious and ready to be on her own at a very young age. She is determined. She began talking and walking when she was 9 months old.Her first word was dada. She has decided she will be a graphic designer. Look out world. She will be a driving,and motivating force, who goes after what she wants.

The youngest is still deciding what she will do in the future. She is making decisions that will impact her future. She is a watcher and observer. At 13 months she decided to walk. I didn't hear the usually baby speech babblings from her. Her first word was a sentence spoken at 11 months. "I want some water." Whatever she decides, it will be her choice and not mine.

Self reliant children is what they appear to be. Yes, that is what I wanted. However, I sometimes miss the days when they were little. " Where is the little girl I carried? Where is the little boy at play? I don't remember growing older. When did they?" (lyrics from "Fiddler on the Roof")click on title"Little Women" for a video.

Change is coming to USPS

I am ecstatic and excited about the changes that will soon take place at the United States Post Office.(Quick! Click on the title"Change is coming to USPS".) Like many other businesses, USPS is failing financially. There are lots of laws and regulations USPS must abide by. Laws and regulations need to be changed and updated in order for USPS to reorganize yet once again and become profitable.

The price of gas, and decreased mail volume (some of the large businesses our good customers are out of business)have contributed to the financial woes of USPS.

Should USPS get a bailout? As a taxpayer, I am against this. Americans cannot afford to bailout every bank, insurance company, and other businesses that are failing financially. USPS has the means to survive and be self sufficient.

Copyright 2009, Michelle I. Peterson. Some rights reserved.
To reproduce or distribute, visit: miva-music.icopyright.com

Simple?

Simplify simplify. I would love to live simply in unity with the earth. I would love just to ride a bicycle to and from. I long to shed all the stuff I really don't need. Why is it, I hold onto things? In the end, it is not those things that matter. What will matter is the effort I put forth on the earth to make a difference. What will the future generations think about my generation? What will be written about this era in the history books? Will books still be around? Will all written script have been converted to digital text? No more books?

I want to take the time to sew my own clothes and knit beautiful things for my family and friends. I would love to work in my own garden some day...but not now. I am too busy working. Tis the season of lent. Time to reflect on yesterday, meditate on today, and think about the future.

I do enjoy my once a week respite from busyness with the art group. When I paint, I am creating.

Once, a blank canvas pale and bare.
stood waiting to be discovered.
I wonder what picture lies asleep
awaiting to be uncovered?

Will it be a postcard picture,
flowers, or trees?
Maybe an abstract, realistic
or imagery?

It is a painting that's cherished and sweet
of a childhood memory.

(Photo of mom and me)
Copyright 2009, Michelle I. Peterson. Some rights reserved.
To reproduce or distribute, visit: miva-music.icopyright.com

Barbershop Memory

My mother was a barber. She owned her own barbershop in Phoenix, AZ. I remember everyday after school, my sister and I had to go to the barber shop. As I swept the floor of the shop, a cascade of different hair colors and textures would pile up in front of the bristles of the push broom. Mom always had the daily paper there laying on a table.

I enjoyed reading the daily comics and completing the cross word puzzles my mother and some of her customers had begun. I remember reading the "Peanuts" comic strip written by Charles Shultz. I could identify with each of the characters in Peanuts. Either, I shared some of the personality traits (of a character) or knew someone that did.

So, what did I have in common with Charlie Brown? Charlie Brown's father was a barber just like my mother. When it came to life, things seldom went the way Charlie Brown planned or wanted them to go. Every now and then, sometimes something would go right. Like the hundreds of times Charlie tries to kick the football and Lucy snatches the football causing Charlie to end up somersaulting and landing in a supine position with a THUD! Why did Charlie keep trying to punt the ball when he knew Lucy could not be trusted to hold it? Why did I keep cheering and rooting for Charlie to kick it!Kick the ball! Then, there is the one time that Charlie Brown actually got to kick the Ball!! Yea for the under dog.(Click on the title "Barbershop Memory" for a link to a video.)

Charles Shultz (1922-2000)had a wonderful wit and a good sense of humor. Not only was he a talented artist, he was also a great pianist. There is a museum honoring Charles Shultz and his contributions to the world. www.shultzmuseum.org
Copyright 2009, Michelle I. Peterson. Some rights reserved.
To reproduce or distribute, visit: miva-music.icopyright.com

Lemonade

I just finished reading an article by Rev. George Clifford "Is celibacy the preferred Christian option?" (www.episcopalcafe.com/daily) What are my thoughts on this subject after reading this article?

I agree that there are different stages or seasons in life: infancy, childhood, adolescence, teenage, and adulthood. I think of my life as a journey. Throughout my journey, I have spent a lot of time traveling alone. There was a time when I was the busy student living with my family. The young adult working her first real job. The young busy career woman, married with children, juggling the responsibilities of work and home. Currently, I find myself at the empty nest stage. I'm single, still working, preparing for retirement, filling up the empty spaces of my time with lots of activity.

What was it like for the disciples when they left their families and the comforts of home to follow Jesus? Some of them were married. While with Jesus, they lived a monastic, celibate, life. In my current status, I can relate to this. I have been curious about God and a spiritual person at a very young age. I continue to seek Him throughout my life.

Paul wrote to the church about Christ's teachings. On the subject of celibacy he had this to say (paraphrase)"God is a jealous god. It is better for a man or woman not to marry. But if you find yourself overtaken with passion, it is better to marry than to fornicate and die in sin." I also think it is better to be single and have a peace of mind than to be in an unhealthy relationship.

Whatever your status, single or married it is a gift. I know I fall short sometimes, but overall I hope I am using my gift well. I will continue to make lemonade when life gives me lemons. This is my way of being optimistic. (click on title "Lemonade" for link to video.)
Copyright 2009, Michelle I. Peterson. Some rights reserved.
To reproduce or distribute, visit: miva-music.icopyright.com

Let's Dance

I love to tap into my creative side. I have rekindled my love for drawing and painting recently. Once a week on Thursday, I paint with a small group of other painters. One member of our group Helen is very good. Helen's hobby has turned into a profitable venture. I enjoy painting with the group. Everyone in the painting group does it for a hobby. There are three main mediums that can be used to paint an artistic impression: watercolors, oils and acrylic. My first two paintings were done with acrylic. I am currently working on a portrait in oil.

This painting is my second one. I used acrylic. I also embellished the painting with glitter and buttons. These flowers make me happy. They remind me of dancing.
(Click on the title "Let's Dance" for a link to my friend Helen's website.
Copyright 2009, Michelle I. Peterson. Some rights reserved.
To reproduce or distribute, visit: miva-music.icopyright.com

GObama!!!

President Obama trys to block AIG's bonuses to executives.

Prayer in Wartime

I really like the prayer in today's morning prayer readings: http://dailyoffice.wordpress.com

Collect of the Day: Monday in the Third Week of Lent

Look upon the heart-felt desires of your humble servants, Almighty God, and stretch forth the right hand of your majesty to be our defense against all our enemies; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

[Prayer concerning War in Iraq and Afghanistan
by Josh Thomas

always optional

[Almighty God, we look with grieved distress on wars in Iraq and Afghanistan; we watch human beings murdered, decapitated, burned alive. All we can do is think of Jesus and behold your shameful Cross.

[Give us the courage to look at your Son’s gentleness on Calvary, Lord. Give us the courage to look.

[We beg you to bless our soldiers, granting them every humanitarian victory, saving them from all harm and bringing them home with your fastest godly speed; that they may be swiftly reunited with their loved ones and received with grateful thanks.

[We pray humbly, guiltily, earnestly for all the peoples of Afghanistan and Iraq; for an end to violence and murder and the restoration of order, prosperity and peace. We pray you to enlighten your servant Barack, the President of the United States, and all the members of Congress with their advisers, generals and critics, that we may obey your divine demand for justice; and enact, with your beloved peoples of all lands, your lasting peace.

[We pray for Israel, O LORD, your Promised Land; for your dear Palestine and all its neighbors; for Jordan, Lebanon, Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Afghanistan, Iraq and Iran. And yes, dear God, we pray most heartily for these United States.

[We raise our hands and hearts to you, O YHWH, and to your Son Jesus Christ, knowing and respecting that other peoples may call you by a different name and discern you in a different light; even as we proclaim your majesty, your sovereignty and your permanent, magisterial blessing, from your holy city Jerusalem to your entire far-flung universe of earthlings, saints and stars:

[One true GOD, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, world without end. Amen.]

A Collect for Peace

O God, the author of peace and lover of concord, to know you is eternal life and to serve you is perfect freedom: Defend us, your humble servants, in all assaults of our enemies; that we, surely trusting in your defense, may not fear the power of any adversaries; through the might of Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

I look forward to the end of the war. It is so easy for me to get caught up in the trivialities and minutia of everyday life. Right this minute there is a man or woman facing a life threatening situation. There is a son who longs for his parents. There is a mother who misses her children and husband. A father whose presence in the home is missed. A daughter is looking forward to returning to the normal civillian life in the beautiful United States of America. (Click on the title "Prayer in Wartime")

A Cazillion Dollars

Today, I read an article in the New York Times about American International Group (AIG). According to their website, www.aig.com, AIG is an insurance company that operates in 130 countries. They sell property,casualty and life insurance. AIG received 170 billion dollars in bailout money. The money AIG received should have been used to pay off their debts. Any money left over should have been reinvested in the company and put in a savings account. However, AIG has mismanaged the bailout money by issuing bonuses to its greedy corporate cronies. What happened to business ethics? How can a business justify giving bonuses to its executives when the company is operating at a deficit? What is AIG's response "Ooopsy. I promise the next time you give me a cazillion dollars I'll be responsible...really."

There should be a cap on the bonus amount executives receive. New laws need to be written and enforced. Why? Apparently, the Ten Commandments is not enough. (The Old Testament reading today in church was about the Ten Commandments Exodus 20:1-17). Our founding fathers wrote and signed the Declaration of Independence based on Christian principles. So in essence, the laws of Moses in the Bible was a foundation for the laws of our great USA.

Businesses will not operate judiciously or ethically on their own. They have to be regulated and kept under public scrutiny. Under the new law, a business will not issue monetary bonuses when it is operating at a deficit. If this law is violated, the business will face fines and the guilty parties could face imprisonment.

AIG should have used the cazillion dollars responsibly by:
*paying off its debts
*reinvesting money in the company
*put money into a savings account
*giving money back to the unemployed, homeless, financially impoverished taxpayers
(Click on the title "A Cazillion Dollars" for video)
Copyright 2009, Michelle I. Peterson. Some rights reserved.
To reproduce or distribute, visit: miva-music.icopyright.com

Shocking Facts about Internet, Technology, & World

Click on the title to view video. I think it is interesting to consider how America is not number one in technology. Our world has become very global. It really is a small world after all.

Thanks Chuck!!

I learned today a pillar of the community has died: Chuck Olmstead. He was a television news reporter for WHAS 11 News in Louisville, KY. I did not know Mr. Olmstead personally but I did have several opportunities to meet him and speak to him. My encounters with Chuck happened on election day at the voting polls. He was always warm and friendly. Despite the nature of reporting news that could be somewhat disparaging and depressing, Chuck always had something positive or witty to say.

Thank you Chuck for your contributions to the world. We will miss you.
(click on the title "Thanks Chuck" for a link to a video.)

Hello to Achoo!

This morning, I awoke to birds singing. One thing I look forward to is witnessing the four changes of the seasons. I grew up in Arizona. I spent part of my childhood in Tucson and the other part in Phoenix. In Arizona, there were three seasons: extremely hot, hot, and not so hot. I suppose the 'state of endless summer' would appeal to people who have arthritis and other health conditions that improve in such an arid environment. I miss the desert beauty. I also miss the vividly colored sunsets. Each sunset was a masterpiece consisting of variations in color that subtly changed as the sun sunk deep into it's bed of earth.

I have lived in the Kentuckiana area for two decades. For those of you not familiar with the word Kentuckiana, here is a definition. Kentucky and Indiana are neighbors hence the combined word. I moved to Louisville, Kentucky with my fiance. We eventually married and had two children. Later, we divorced. During the divorce proceedings, I moved to a quaint Southern Indiana town: New Albany. My girls were the ages of six and eight. I absolutely love New Albany. It has a small town feel. It reminded me of the town of Mayberry on the "Andy Griffith Show". New Albany was my safe haven where I could escape the marital turmoil. New Albany is where I wrote all the songs for my CD "Cruise Control". "Cruise Control" was my therapy. The songs on this cd provide me with comfort. The lyrics to the title song include.."I don't know what tomorrow holds but I know God is in control". After living in New Albany for seven years,I moved back to Louisville, KY. I had transportation problems getting back and forth to work for a week when the engine in my car died. New Albany, IN is five miles from Louisville, KY. Indiana and Kentucky are separated by the Ohio River. Now, I live closer to work and church.

It is hard for me to pick which season I like the best: winter, fall, spring or summer. I like winter. Snow is always new to me. I love when it snows. Winter is when Mother Nature covers the city in a white fleece winter blanket. Summer in the Kentuckiana area is very mild to me compared to the intense hot conditions in Arizona. I survived a summer in Arizona where it did not rain for 99 days. The average summer day ranged from 105 to 120 degrees. The sun was so hot, you could bake outside: no need for an oven. With no humidity in the air, the summer breeze singes you with scorching heat each time the wind blows. Summer in Kentuckiana feels like a tropical paradise to me. It actually rains more than once. Plants continue to flourish in the summer. Frankly, it doesn't get hot in Kentuckiana to me. As long as there is humidity in the air, there is coolness. With humidity in the air, the summer breeze kisses you with moisture. I love the newness and rebirth of spring. It is inspiring to witness the evidence of life out of once frozen plants and trees. The fall foilage is amazing. I love the rich warm colors of fall.

Spring and fall though enjoyable give me the most trouble with my allergies. I did not know I had allergies until I moved to Kentuckiana. I am not alone. The Kentuckiana landscape is rich with many beautiful and varied plant life. I have seen flowers grow here that I never saw in the desert landscape of Arizona. Everywhere I look, a carpet of green vegetation clothes the earth. As a result of all the normal rainfall every year, there is plenty of pollen, mold, and grass. I am allergic to all of these. When I use to hear people talk about allergies, I thought they were making a big deal out of nothing. Now that I am a member of allergy sufferers, I have changed my tune. Having allergies is like being afflicted with the flu. I feel very heavy, and lethargic, like I'm carrying a dragon on my back. My throat feels like sandpaper. My eyes itch. My nose drips and I am constantly...a a a chooo!!!! Sneezing.(Click onto the title "Hello to Achoo" for a neat link.)

Goodbye winter and hello to achoo.
Copyright 2009, Michelle I. Peterson. Some rights reserved.
To reproduce or distribute, visit: miva-music.icopyright.com

Yes. She's a Genius

Every Wednesday, I share quality reading time with a spunky, spirited, bright eyed, inquisitive, second grade girl. Her name is Hailey. This is my second year participating in Metro Louisville's Every One Reads Program. Adult volunteers are matched with students ranging from first grade through high school.

My involvement with Every One Reads (E1R) came along at a time I needed it. What? Isn't this program about enriching our children? It absolutely is about helping every child in Kentucky be proficient in reading. E1R has made my life richer. Connecting with young students has filled a void in my life.

A series of events have caught me off guard. Things happen too early. My marriage ended after 10 years. I lost my mother to cancer when she was 51. I ended up being her caretaker in my early 30's. Now, in my 40's, I already have an empty nest. My teenage daughters decided to live with their father. My oldest daughter left me first to live with her father and stepmother at age 13. The girls are two years apart. The youngest was 11 when her sister left. My youngest daughter left me 2 years ago when she was 14. So, here I am with a broken heart filled with hurt and feelings of loss that come with children growing up, being independent, and trying to find their identity. Suddenly, I have a commodity: lots of time on my hands.

I enjoy children. I have many fond memories of the fun activites I did with my girls when they were growing up. I love all babies. All babies are cute. My baby girls were the most adorable babies. As for my concensus on teenagers, I will reflect upon this age group when my daughters are in their 20's.

I first heard about E1R on a t.v. commercial. Then, I heard about it at work. Several people at work volunteer for this program. I learned about E1R at work through the Combined Federal Campaign (CFC). "The mission of the CFC is to promote and support philanthropy through a program that is employee focused, cost-efficient, and effective in providing all federal employees the opportunity to improve the quality of life for all." www.opm.gov/cfc Finally, I heard again about E1R through my church. Several parishoners in church are active volunteers with E1R. One Sunday morning during Sunday School, there was a presentation about the E1R program. Finally, I relented to the tugging at my heart and decided to be trained so I too could be an E1R volunteer.

My first student two years ago was a 7 year old 2nd grader named Henry. I was kind of nervous about our first meeting. I wondered if I could relate well with a little boy. I spent most of my time with girls. When my daughters lived under my roof, we were active in Girl Scouts. I was a Troop Leader. I had lots of fun with the girls and women in Girl Scouts. Before I became a mother, I grew up in a household of women. My mother divorced my father when I was very young. My mother raised three girls. My mother told me the history of our family and girls by far out numbered the boys. Ergo, my well founded concerns on whether I could connect with a little boy.

Henry was a shy, bright eyed, energetic, eager, full of wonder, polite child. He talked with a slight lisp. I enjoyed watching Henry transform from an insecure to a confident reader. I learned a lot about Henry. Henry and I shared many things in common. What did a middle age woman have in common with a seven year old boy? A love of Star Wars, snow, Winnie the Pooh,and a love of learning.

Hailey is a talkative, outgoing, sociable, active, girl with a lot of personality. She is confident and definite about herself. Look out world. I'm convinced I tutoring a genius. This middle aged woman also has plenty in common with a feisty seven year old girl. For instance, we both like headbands, puppies, Girl Scouts, ice cream, and a love of learning. Hailey tells me definitely, "I am good in science. I would make a great scientist." To her statement, I reply, "Yes, you would because you are smart."

My broken heart continues to mend each and every day as I recieve the benefits from spending a little quality time with precious children.(click on the title "Yes. She's a Genius" for a special link).

Walk The Walk

Deuteronomy 9:13-21 (NRSV)

Furthermore the LORD said to me, “I have seen that this people is indeed a stubborn people. Let me alone that I may destroy them and blot out their name from under heaven; and I will make of you a nation mightier and more numerous than they.”

So I turned and went down from the mountain, while the mountain was ablaze; the two tablets of the covenant were in my two hands. Then I saw that you had indeed sinned against the LORD your God, by casting for yourselves an image of a calf; you had been quick to turn from the way that the LORD had commanded you. So I took hold of the two tablets and flung them from my two hands, smashing them before your eyes. Then I lay prostrate before the LORD as before, forty days and forty nights; I neither ate bread nor drank water, because of all the sin you had committed, provoking the LORD by doing what was evil in his sight. For I was afraid that the anger that the LORD bore against you was so fierce that he would destroy you. But the LORD listened to me that time also. The LORD was so angry with Aaron that he was ready to destroy him, but I interceded also on behalf of Aaron at that same time. Then I took the sinful thing you had made, the calf, and burned it with fire and crushed it, grinding it thoroughly, until it was reduced to dust; and I threw the dust of it into the stream that runs down the mountain.

Today's Daily Office reading is about Moses and the people of Isreael. Yesterday, while making coffee, I reflected upon the great leaders of the Bible. Moses, not only wrote the Jewish laws, he lived by them. He lead by example. Moses also interceded on behalf of the people when they broke the law. I had that thought because I am so disenchanted with the leadership of a great historical organization: The United States Post Office. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hf1B-tyagko or click on the title "Walk The Walk" for a direct link to the video.

I think it is wrong for the Postmaster General to receive a six figure bonus when USPS is operating in a deficit. How can that be justified? Mr. Potter has transformed from a humble letter carrier to another greedy corporate CEO. Many leaders have fallen morally. If I were the CEO of USPS under the same conditions as Mr. Potter, I'd set an example. I would not take a bonus unless we were making profits. I'd also make a new rule "No bonuses given when USPS is operating in a deficit."

Economic Uncertainty

The Dow continues to sprial downward. Today's headlines reported the Dow Jones average at 6. Thanks be to God, I suffered some financial lost but I can recover. Unfortunately, there are others who have endured great amounts of loss. I pray for them and hope they will find the resources to survive this economic recession. President Obama has signed a stimulus bill that will provide some relief. I recommend to everyone to get out of debt. Pay off your loans and credit cards.

T-Mobile Dance

Click on the title "T-Mobile Dance" to see a cool video

The Meaning

What is the meaning of my life today? I'm supposed to go to class tonight: my business class. It is so hard for me to be enthused about class today. Who cares? What difference does it make? I'm single. I have no cheerleaders rooting for me. My teenagers have left me for their father. I really felt abandoned when they left. I am so angry with my kids. They are not loyal. Everything I tried to teach them, has fallen on insolent minds. I speak. Do I make a sound? I said a profound heartfelt thought out loud. Does anyone listen? Can anyone hear the sound of my voice? I have opinions. So what? Does anyone care?

I sometimes feel lifeless. I have to keep reminding myself of all the heartaches and headaches I endured when the children were under my roof. It was chaotic, hectic, restless, noisy, and full of tension. The children were the focus of my attention. Now they are independent and creating lives of their own making. This phase of life is bittersweet. My girls are self sufficient. There are some benefits to living single. I love having my solitude. I love having enough rest. I love the sound and feel of peace. I love having the freedom to pursue my hobbies and interests without a crude or sarcastic comment. I have filled my life with more than enough projects to keep me busy for the rest of my life. However, I continually long to share my life with Mr. Right for me.

I was married once. I learned many valuable lessons from that marriage. I would like to marry again. But this time the marriage would be a good match between two persons with similar interests yet allowed the freedom to pursue their own passions.

Sigh, I've also partially resigned myself to the possibility, that I may not ever again marry. I have been single for so, so, long. How long, I'd rather not say because it would just remind me of how hopeless my situation is. When I get to this point, I remind myself of how fortunate I am not to be trapped in an unhealthy relationship. I'd rather be single than to be married and miserable, afraid, desperate, and isolated.

You know what really gets on my very last nerves? When the media picks on my ethnicity. I have seen articles from respectable newspapers that degrade black women. There was a headline in my local paper titled " Aids rate highest among African American Women." While surfing online I came across a statistic: 70% of black women are single. How about another oldie: 80% of African American children are raised in single parent households. I have a question, if most black women are single who is giving them aids?(click on title "The Meaning" for direct link to video.)or go to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x8EEnFvynzl

There are many African American women who live with integrity. I think about the women who helped to abolish slavery: Harriett Tubman and Sojourner Truth. I think about God fearing upstanding women who are pillars in their family and communities like my grandmother Charlotte Ruth. When I get discouraged, I remember the sacrifices of my ancestors. Grandmother Ruth always had an encouraging word for me as a child. Grandmother always told me she was praying for me. She admonished me to always put God first in everything I do. Grandmother always, no matter what the circumstance, had faith in God. My grandmother often visited the sick and gave to those in need. My grandmother is now 86 years old and living with my aunt and uncle. She has been retired from her work as a seamstress for Cherry Hospital for many years. Grandmother has been a widow for 12 years. I thank God for my grandmother.

I also think about the strength of my mother who lived alone in the fierce world raising 3 daughters. My mother divorced my father when I was very young. Nothing could scare my mother. She was the strongest woman I know. I am so very thankful of the time I had with her during the last 2 years of her life.

I vow to continue to have faith as I face the unknown. I will not lose hope. On January 20, 2009, Barack Obama was inaugurated. He is America's first black president. I continue to believe, faith can move mountains. All things are possible with God.